Bird's eye view

Click here to read some of the inside scoop on the wedding extravaganza, from the POV of my dear friend & maid (matron?) of honor April.

At one point, April refers to one of the more disturbing moments of the whole weekend, when the photographer, Alex, had apparently been smoking crack and asked for some oyster crackers to throw in the wind to attract seagulls, so that they would soar around elegantly (like in one of those inspirational posters often found in the break rooms of corporate offices, with quotes related to teamwork and "soaring to achieve customer satisfaction" and such). From a distance, seagulls are poetic and inspirational. Up close, seagulls are mean, disease-ridden birds who crap like it's their job - which it pretty much is.

Fortunately, the seagulls didn't crap on us, but one of them came close enough to put an eye out, dive-bombing to grab three whole crackers in one sortie. Those f*ckers loves them some oyster crakers.

It was very inspirational. I felt inspired to learn to operate a pellet gun. I haven't seen the photos yet, but we might have to superimpose an inspirational slogan at the bottom of each one.

More later this afternoon ...